Gurjinder Basran

Someone You Love is Gone by Gurjinder Basran is a beautiful novel centered around grief.

Picking this book up, after losing my own Father years ago, was kind of like therapy. I was able to see someone else facing the exact thing I had (keep in mind a different gendered parent) and having a similar response to me. Gurjinder Basran does a fantastic job of showing how grief affects a person.

The small losses of temper, without meaning to was a big part of mine and my Mother's grief. Seeing this happen was truly incredible - our main character Simran does not purposely yell at her daughter or her husband, it just happens. The emotions that go through someone when experiencing grief is very expressive in this book - and it shows how talented this author is.

I'd hate to say this book is like a "slice of life" novel, but it is - but a slice of grief and the life that comes after. So many sayings that you don't think about - like how you just get used to grief and it doesn't get better - are displayed in this story. Before someone dies, you say that but don't realize how true those sayings really are. You don't realize how haunting it is to be here and that person who's in your memories and clothes are still in their closets are just not there - they don't exist anymore. This beautiful novel shows all of this, and it almost made me cry thinking about how honest this book is compared to my own grief.

I relate a lot of Sim, and I think this is why the book speaks to me so much.

When her husband comes home from work only to get changed to go out for drinks for work, leaving Sim behind when she really needs someone (and her daughter goes back to school and won't even hug her mother goodbye) speaks to me on so many levels. All of my friends and family ditched me as soon as my Father died, leaving me alone for the final month of high school. Literally alone. It speaks to me so much on so many levels to see THIS IS REAL. This was not just my small reality, but this can be others as well - even if this book is fictional.

Overall, this book is truly beautiful. I could go on and spoil everything, but I would rather just state my opinion to finish it off.

This book shows the gradual change in grief - immediately losing a parent, dealing with the emotions after, dealing with relationships during grief, trying to pick what's best and how to grieve, and the finale of finally accepting it.

This book should be read by those experiencing or who have experienced grief to understand. This was far better than any therapist or book I was forced to read during my grief - those self help books are rarely helpful, let's be honest.

Five out of five stars.

I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.… (mehr)

Apparently this book shares a title with a song from the 80s, which is not addressed in the book in any meaningful way. When I checked the book out, I thought based on the title that it would be a "he talks to them from the afterlife" type book. He doesn't This book has multiple POVs, which can be awesome. Here, it isn't. This book is ninety percent narrative passages and the characters thinking, thinking, and musing while doing something slowly. It is boring upon boring. The narrative passages that take up nearly all of this book are structured so that when dialogue does happen, it feels odd. It's sparse and lackluster, and hardly does anything for characterization. Despite all their thinking, thinking, and musing, I went away from this book having no real idea of who these characters -were-. At the thirty-three percent mark of the edition I was reading, the POV switches to the dead kid's diary. The shift in tone and content was at first welcome, but grew just as repetitive as the other passages in this book. Two teens get together and I thought it would be -way- more angsty than it was. Was the author bored of writing at this point? What a letdown. Another teen gets a manic pixie dream girlfriend, Rose. She was by far the most engaging character in the story. She deserved a more interesting book. The ending was incredibly bland, the whale symbolism was poorly used, and the tattoos were just fucking stupid. The author slipped in remarks that were against tattoo guns, and pro stick-and-poke ones. Stick-and-poke ones are permanent tattoos that aren't done with tattoo guns. Tattoo guns are used overwhelmingly by professionals, in sterile environments. These professionals will sit down and talk to you in depth about the design you want and sketch it out until you're absolutely sure. Walk-ins can be a thing in some parlors. The tattoo done by a gun getting infected in this book ruffled my feathers. I can't speak to stick-and-poke tattoos, but they've always been described to me as...like...for people who are afraid of tattoos, needles, artists, or all of the above. Until I read this book, I thought it was a way for grownups to say "temporary tattoo" without sounding silly. Seems like I just heard childish descriptions by immature adults who thought they were edgy. So to those who do have stick-and-poke tattoos for their own reasons, I apologize for the opinion I had formed. This book still makes both ways of administering tattoos seem fucking stupid. It makes -tattoos- seem stupid when the author was probably going for "edgy." No, author. I don't plan to read anything else written by this author until the author learns to be interesting.… (mehr)

Help! I’m Alive is a book that explores the impact that a person's suicide can have on their loved ones. Jay's death is caught on camera and widely circulated, leaving those closest to him with more questions than answers. Help! I’m Alive is told in third person from the perspective of four people in alternating chapters, showing how grief impacts everyone differently and there is no set path to follow in order to heal and continue on with their own lives.

A well written quick but powerful read, Help! I'm Alive sends out a powerful message on pain, depression, anger, and the aftermath of suicide on those you leave behind.

I highly recommend this to YA fans and anyone who can mentally handle the topics touched on in this book. Your own mental health is the most important thing so please take into consideration the trigger warnings associated with this book and talk to those around you about the book and how you felt as you move along the story.

Thank you to netgalley for providing an e-copy for me to read and leave my honest opinion with everyone reading this. Its been a while since I've read any book that does a better job of handling such a tragedy as suicide.… (mehr)

(25 October 2017)

Everything in Meena’s life can be viewed in two ways. There are six daughters in her family but only five of them are mentioned after Harj ran away. Aunties watch your every move and the family unit is protected, but domestic violence is witnessed and ignored. Meena wants to be a writer but her writing is used against her. Unconventional, arty Liam says he’ll wait for her and doesn’t.

Set in the Canadian Sikh community from 1990 through into the 2000s, it’s threaded through with pop culture – mostly music – references that will resonate with anyone but imbued with a special sense of what it is to be embedded in a community within a community – and with a precarious position within that inner community. When Meena is criticised for this, you wonder what her other choice would be. Very difficult, whatever the reason.

It’s very well done, especially as I think it’s a first novel, and we’re pulled into caring for Meena as she tries to negotiate life without much support, navigating the arranged marriage to another bad boy that she’s accepted, her only real ally – even when Liam reappears in her life – her childhood friend Kal. And he’s her husband’s cousin, so which side is he supposed to be on?

I guessed one of the plot points but it’s a really good, engaging read.… (mehr)