Tracy Hogg (1960–2004)

This book stresses me out. Tracy Hogg might be fun in person, but in print she comes across as very condescending ("you might think that's a good idea but it's not, love" — okay, that's not an actual quote but it pretty much summarizes her tone). The main thrust of the book is her EASY method (eat, activity, sleep, you time), which isn't all that innovative given that Baby Wise had already been pushing the feed-wake-sleep pattern for years.

There's a lot of fearmongering here about "accidental parenting," which is defined as falling into bad habits because they seem to work initially. Hogg warns parents of the awful things that will happen if they do something crazy like, say, rock their baby to sleep. Her patronizing tone comes through here, too, as she informs us clueless parents that it's all our fault our baby is having problems and we can, by dint of excruciating effort, break the bad habits WE created. Nothing like a load of guilt and a mountain of work to encourage and motivate you, right? Especially when you are running on two or three (non-consecutive) hours of sleep.

Oh, and speaking of guilt, Hogg lays it on thick for parents considering the cry-it-out method. Leaving a baby to cry alone for as much as five minutes "makes her hair stand on end." I have to wonder if Hogg has even worked with babies. Crying comes with the territory.

Hogg's approach to discipline also leaves something to be desired. She describes a scenario where your child consistently fails to get along with your friend's child, and says you might need to have playdates with another child instead, "even if you don't fancy her mum as much." So basically, don't discipline your child, don't teach him to deal with different personalities, don't help him understand his own heart and responsibility. No, just remove the offending factor and make things easy. Because that's how real life works, right?

I tried Hogg's suggestions about sleep and they failed abysmally. My "spirited" baby would have no truck with her shush-pat method. It might have worked better when babies were being put down to sleep on their bellies, but not now that we lay them on their backs. He simply looked up at me, wide awake and getting awaker, every time I tried her suggestions.

Maybe she just caught me at a sensitive time, but I can't think of this book without a mental shudder and it's going to Goodwill. Or perhaps the garbage. Thank goodness for the sensible and experienced moms around me who gave me common-sense advice that helped us navigate some of the rougher patches of early babyhood. The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems seemed to actually create more problems than it solved... most definitely not recommended.… (mehr)