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Into the Tangle of Friendship : A Memoir of the Things That Matter

von Beth Kephart

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422593,071 (4.3)2
With her first book, A SLANT OF SUN, Beth Kephart wrote about parenting and drew us, in the words of the National Book Award jurors, "into a world of timeless and universal themes: the art of mothering, the cost of difference, and the difference one individual can make." In her second work of nonfiction, she again explores something we often take for granted -- friendship -- and invites us to see it as if for the first time. Beginning with the rediscovery of a long-lost best friend, INTO THE TANGLE OF FRIENDSHIP follows the intertwining stories of a cast of characters for whom friendship is a saving grace. We meet a next-door neighbor facing the death of a spouse, watch two young boys learn what it means to be friends, and feel the heartache of a professional caregiver whose compassion and dedication ultimately come up short. Kephart is concerned with the haphazard ways we find one another, the tragedy, boredom, and sheer carelessness that break us apart, the myriad reasons people stay together and grow. What is friendship, and what is its secret calculus? Telling stories to illuminate this question, she also engages us in an essential dialogue about what it means to be fully alive. Profound, original, and exquisitely written, INTO THE TANGLE OF FRIENDSHIP is a hymn to the intimate realities of our lives and what makes those lives not only worth living but magical. It will resonate with anyone who has ever had a friend, or lost one.… (mehr)
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How do you describe friendship? How do you put into words, without sounding trite or overly sentimental, the essence of what a friend is? Beth Kephart manages to do this terribly difficult thing in a lyrical meditation on the meaning of friendship, how it changes, who we befriend, and why it is important in our lives through her experiences of her own friendships and her observations of her son's and her husband's as well. This is not a funny chronicle of the things she and her friends have done. It is a more spiritual examination of the power of friendship. It is a thoughtful, ruminative writing on just how friendship changes and enriches our life, in small ways and large. As Kephart discovers, our friends help define us, even if they are only briefly a part of our lives. But they round us out and offer themselves to us and Kephart has captured the elusive beauty of this fact with her poetic and honest writing. This book, like the other book of hers that I read, is not a straightforward narrative, relying on the skillful weaving of a descriptive and flowing style to pull together the thread of her thoughts. Billed as a memoir, the chapters have the feel of interconnected essays as much as anything. I would have liked a little more meat to the book but overall, it was a soothing reading experience. ( )
  whitreidtan | Apr 16, 2010 |
This is a beautiful book on the power of friendship. Lovingly written and to-the-point, Beth Kephart has put on paper so many of my own feelings that I was never able to put words to. Not all friendships are easy, some are a challenge, but Beth shows us that we can take something away from each friendship and that even the challenging friendships matter.

I first read Into the Tangle of Friendship several years ago when it was first released. At the time, I was going through many life changes, discovering who I was and discovering new friendships through these life changes. There was so much in the book that spoke to me at the time, I was shocked. It was like Beth had reached in my head and pulled all the emotions that I couldn't speak and put them in her book. I found it just as refreshing reading this book again, now, where I am currently in my life. Some of the friendships that I formed then have moved on, others have remained; some have strengthened, some have weakened, but I cannot deny the fact that each and every one of these people mattered to me, in one way or another. I've learned lessons from each of them, and they have all had an impact of some sort on my life, and I can find parallels to so many of these friendships in Beth's book. It has helped me to look on some of these friendships in a new light, and even those that I feel have gone bad are still important in the lessons that they have taught me. I will be interested to read this book again in a few years to see where I am in my life and how the book will speak to me then.

Beth's writing is amazing. More than just telling us her story, she is painting us a picture with words. Lyrical, poetical, flowing; these can all describe her writing.

You can read each chapter independently of each other, but taken as a whole, they do tell a story. This isn't the type of book to breeze through; read each chapter, sit with it for awhile to fully realize what it is telling you and treasure it. I think everyone will come away with something different from this book, as each of our friendships are different and unique in their own right, but I do think that everyone can relate to the ideas that Beth puts forth in her book. ( )
1 abstimmen tapestry100 | Dec 10, 2008 |
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With her first book, A SLANT OF SUN, Beth Kephart wrote about parenting and drew us, in the words of the National Book Award jurors, "into a world of timeless and universal themes: the art of mothering, the cost of difference, and the difference one individual can make." In her second work of nonfiction, she again explores something we often take for granted -- friendship -- and invites us to see it as if for the first time. Beginning with the rediscovery of a long-lost best friend, INTO THE TANGLE OF FRIENDSHIP follows the intertwining stories of a cast of characters for whom friendship is a saving grace. We meet a next-door neighbor facing the death of a spouse, watch two young boys learn what it means to be friends, and feel the heartache of a professional caregiver whose compassion and dedication ultimately come up short. Kephart is concerned with the haphazard ways we find one another, the tragedy, boredom, and sheer carelessness that break us apart, the myriad reasons people stay together and grow. What is friendship, and what is its secret calculus? Telling stories to illuminate this question, she also engages us in an essential dialogue about what it means to be fully alive. Profound, original, and exquisitely written, INTO THE TANGLE OF FRIENDSHIP is a hymn to the intimate realities of our lives and what makes those lives not only worth living but magical. It will resonate with anyone who has ever had a friend, or lost one.

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