My parents named me Lars but I was born in August under the sign of Virgo and that would have been a better name for me for my first eighteen years. I finished school, spent a year in training camp and entered the army in preparation for the senate. My eighteenth birthday was spent in caravan on the way to Dacia. Having lived most of my life on my father’s villa with a little brother as my closest friend, I had a hard time adjusting to the rough camaraderie of the barracks. I knew what masturbation was all about. I’d discovered it on my own one day and had been practicing ever since. If enthusiasm and experience counted for anything, I was the total master of masturbation.