I can't believe this thing is real. The Klingons look like...no Klingons that ever graced TV screens. Kirk, Spock and Bones spend most of the book in disguise in leotards. I cannot even. It's one of my favorite Star Trek objects for how utterly seriously it takes itself and how utterly ridiculous it is.

The Enterprise is headed to Vega III to sign a trade treaty, to get Korium. The way the book phrases it sounds a bit ominous, though:

Vega III had a large supply of Korium, a rare metal used to build new starships. The United Federation of Planets needed Korium. The Vegans were going to give it to the Federation. The Prisoner of Vega (1977-10), 6

When they arrive, they are told they must leave or be destroyed. Kirk is friends with Queen Vanadala, though, and knows something must be wrong, so Kirk, Spock, and McCoy beam down to investigate.

On the planet, they find that Klingons have taken over Vega III and imprisoned Queen Vanadala in order to take the valuable Korium for themselves. Kirk, Spock, and McCoy knock out three Klingon guards and steal their clothing in order to observe undetected (knowing, as we all do, that Augment Klingons are indistinguishable from humans).

They meet the Klingon leader, and Spock recognizes him:

"It is Commander Kalor!" whispered Spock. "The meanest Klingon of them all. I have met him before." The Prisoner of Vega (1977-10), 22

Our heroes are captured and imprisoned with Queen Vanadala, then all four are taken out to be executed. However, Kirk comes up with a cunning plan: stall for a few minutes until the time they have arranged for Scotty to beam them all back up, so they will be saved.

He does and they are.

Like The Truth Machine, it's not much of a story, but it's a picture book, so... good enough.

Access a version of the below that includes more illustrations on my blog.

By any objective measure, this is not a very good book: Kirk and the Enterprise visit an alien planet to secure trade with the Federation, the Klingons are there, Kirk wins by beaming the Klingon commander up with a plan that depends on an incredible amount of coincidence and isn't really explained all that well.

What makes the book fun are the pictures by Robert Swanson, which are excellent, but weirdly inaccurate. Like, he gets the likenesses down perfectly, but no one has an assignment patch on their uniform, and Captain Kirk has a digital wristwatch. Plus there's his Klingon uniforms, which defy all explanation, and give you some pretty awesome pictures of Captain Kirk showing off his legs.

The plot means that Kirk actually spends most of the story in this goofy disguise, rather than his usual uniform, which seems a pretty big oversight for a picture book.

Swanson's clearly been given some reference material, but no one has told him what it actually means. His Klingon ship on the surface of Vega looks like the Federation installation Deep Space Station K-7. Did someone hand him pictures from "The Trouble with Tribbles" but not tell him no Klingon ship actually appears in the episode? Still, it looks pretty good even if the subject matter is goofy. I can't wait until I have a kid, and this book is their introduction to Star Trek. It'll warp their perceptions for life.

The Klingons have taken over Vaga III. It is up to Captain Kirk and the USS Enterprise to take it back! ( )