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When Seltzer was Two Cents a Glass: A History of America and Me, 1929-1955

von Bernard Murstein

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In the early 1920s, two teen-agers immigrated to New York City from Poland. They met, married, and raised three boys during the Great Depression. I am Bernard, the eldest son, and this book depicts the first twenty-six years of my life. Despite minimal income, our parents provided us with food, clothing, and shelter. They modeled desirable characteristics for us: ambition, self-education, charitable work, and persistence in achieving goals. However, these hard-working immigrants had little time, energy, or knowledge of children's needs. They asked no questions about my friends, life in school, or feelings. My anxious mother saw the world as a dangerous place. My father basically ignored me except to criticize, but never spent time educating me. When children are denied meaningful attention from their parents, they can become narcissists, longing to be the center of attention. Because I was good-looking, I became an object of admiration. A girl I met in my class once exhibited me to her mother as a "trophy" classmate. Possessed of a quick wit and verbal skills, I became an entertainer. However, I still felt ill at ease in meeting new people, and I worried about the impression I was making. Focused inward, I was often incapable of seeing others. I was hypersensitive to criticism from others, but, paradoxically, imitated my father's criticalness in making fun of others if it brought me attention. As a physically late maturer physically, I developed a sense of inferiority and inadequacy. Friends might have taken up the slack to some extent, but our parents moved 7 times in the first 8 years of my life, searching for ever- cheaper rentals. I had to adjust constantly to new classmates, teachers, and environments, while my parents were unaware of the stress these moves caused. In 1940, the moves stopped for a decade when the family moved near a utopia in the Bronx, the socialist United Workers Cooperative Colony, occupied by 2,500 idealistic needle-trade workers and families. I joined a club of young socialists, but fell briefly into disfavor when my comrades designated me at age eleven, year-old "a traitor to the working class" for opposing the Soviet- German Nonaggression Pact of 1939. My story is played out against a background of America's political and social history. Each chapter of the book begins with a description of political events, followed by personal experiences from the 1930s to 1950s. After obtaining my PhD in 1954, I was still eligible for the draft. I applied for a commission in the army as a psychologist. To my surprise, an organization I had joined during World War II turned up on my questionnaire as a "subversive" organization, though my membership consisted of playing on the basketball team and collecting fats, newspapers, and scrap iron for the war effort. My application was denied, yet for unknown reasons I was not drafted. My life improved in early adulthood. Obtaining a PhD and marriage added stability and a modicum of confidence. At first glance, it seemed a most improbable marriage. She had great interpersonal skills and numerous friendships of both sexes. Indeed, she had been courted by at least a half dozen suitors. Many years later, a friend described us as a "balloon" and a "sandbag." She was a "sophisticated" balloon, well traveled, full of creative ideas and initiatives, broadening my view of the world. I was the sandbag, knowledgeable and realistic, providing stability and a solid anchor. At ages 26 and 23 respectively, my wife, Nelly (working on her PhD), and I were full of hope for success in our professional careers. We were shocked therefore to discover that episodes of anti-Semitism and misogyny awaited us. These struggles are described in the second and final volume of the memoirs, entitled Memoirs of a Professional Malcontent: A History of My America, 1956-2013.… (mehr)
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In the early 1920s, two teen-agers immigrated to New York City from Poland. They met, married, and raised three boys during the Great Depression. I am Bernard, the eldest son, and this book depicts the first twenty-six years of my life. Despite minimal income, our parents provided us with food, clothing, and shelter. They modeled desirable characteristics for us: ambition, self-education, charitable work, and persistence in achieving goals. However, these hard-working immigrants had little time, energy, or knowledge of children's needs. They asked no questions about my friends, life in school, or feelings. My anxious mother saw the world as a dangerous place. My father basically ignored me except to criticize, but never spent time educating me. When children are denied meaningful attention from their parents, they can become narcissists, longing to be the center of attention. Because I was good-looking, I became an object of admiration. A girl I met in my class once exhibited me to her mother as a "trophy" classmate. Possessed of a quick wit and verbal skills, I became an entertainer. However, I still felt ill at ease in meeting new people, and I worried about the impression I was making. Focused inward, I was often incapable of seeing others. I was hypersensitive to criticism from others, but, paradoxically, imitated my father's criticalness in making fun of others if it brought me attention. As a physically late maturer physically, I developed a sense of inferiority and inadequacy. Friends might have taken up the slack to some extent, but our parents moved 7 times in the first 8 years of my life, searching for ever- cheaper rentals. I had to adjust constantly to new classmates, teachers, and environments, while my parents were unaware of the stress these moves caused. In 1940, the moves stopped for a decade when the family moved near a utopia in the Bronx, the socialist United Workers Cooperative Colony, occupied by 2,500 idealistic needle-trade workers and families. I joined a club of young socialists, but fell briefly into disfavor when my comrades designated me at age eleven, year-old "a traitor to the working class" for opposing the Soviet- German Nonaggression Pact of 1939. My story is played out against a background of America's political and social history. Each chapter of the book begins with a description of political events, followed by personal experiences from the 1930s to 1950s. After obtaining my PhD in 1954, I was still eligible for the draft. I applied for a commission in the army as a psychologist. To my surprise, an organization I had joined during World War II turned up on my questionnaire as a "subversive" organization, though my membership consisted of playing on the basketball team and collecting fats, newspapers, and scrap iron for the war effort. My application was denied, yet for unknown reasons I was not drafted. My life improved in early adulthood. Obtaining a PhD and marriage added stability and a modicum of confidence. At first glance, it seemed a most improbable marriage. She had great interpersonal skills and numerous friendships of both sexes. Indeed, she had been courted by at least a half dozen suitors. Many years later, a friend described us as a "balloon" and a "sandbag." She was a "sophisticated" balloon, well traveled, full of creative ideas and initiatives, broadening my view of the world. I was the sandbag, knowledgeable and realistic, providing stability and a solid anchor. At ages 26 and 23 respectively, my wife, Nelly (working on her PhD), and I were full of hope for success in our professional careers. We were shocked therefore to discover that episodes of anti-Semitism and misogyny awaited us. These struggles are described in the second and final volume of the memoirs, entitled Memoirs of a Professional Malcontent: A History of My America, 1956-2013.

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