Tommy Tomlinson

Tommy Tomlinson comes to terms with being both a good person, and a liar. He's been lying to his friends, his family, his wife, and most of all himself, about his food addiction, and his weight. For the first time, in this book, he admits to the actual number on the scale, how he reached it and why he thinks he landed there. This is not a woe is me it's everyone else's fault kind of story. Nor is it a follow me and I'll teach you to drop 50 pounds a month manual. It's an honest and heart felt memoir of growing up big, in a family where food was used to celebrate triumphs as much as it was to console and soothe loss. Anyone who has ever struggled with their weight or is still struggling now can relate to this, and anyone who has ever looked at larger people and wondered how they let themselves get so big could benefit from this read.

I received an advance copy for review.… (mehr)

A well-told story of a man on a quest to overcome, or accept, the severe weight challenges that have dogged him his whole life. Because Tomlinson is a gifted journalist, he manages to tell this story with clarity, objectivity, and a capable awareness of which details matter to the reader, and what can get left on the editing room floor.

This may or may not be a spoiler, but here goes: This is not the story of a man who miraculously discovers how to unearth his thinner, healthier self so we spend the last act of the book reveling in his newfound svelteness. He makes doggedly determined, small steps toward a better life, with a hell of a lot of detours along the way. He maxes out at well over 400 lbs, struggles with the inner demons of not being worthy of love, of embarrassment at taking a seat at a ballgame or on an airplane. He speaks honestly about how food has been a balm for him, a safe haven when fear or uncertainty crept in or reassurance was needed. I believe his story will help many understand the issue of 'food addiction' in a way they maybe had not before.

His story is not one of neglect or abuse. He has a loving family, a wife he can't believe looked twice at him, much less wanted to spend her life with him, and he is very confident in his capabilities as a writer and observer of the human condition.

Tomlinson is from the south, and much of the story takes place in Georgia and surrounding states, so it's familiar terrain for me as a reader. Along the way, he shares insights on music, sports, race, and other topics he's had the opportunity to specialize in as a journalist, mostly as a pathway to tell the story of where he was at a particular time in his career/life in conjunction with his health issues (obesity, cancer, etc).

It's a quick and easy read, but that's not to say it's not well-written. It is, in fact, because it is so well-written that it moves along at such an unobstructed, brisk pace.

For anyone who has struggled to lose 10, 20, 100, or 200 lbs; or for anyone who has looked at a heavy person and said "why don't they lose weight?", this book is a worthwhile read. It shows there are no easy answers, other than showing up, and not letting discouragement win the day. It also reminds us that there's a lot of misinformation and cruelty out there, and we would do well to humanize those we objectify. Tomlinson does a marvelous job at this, evoking empathy without ever falling into self-pity.… (mehr)

The Elephant in the Room is a powerful look at what it is like to be a severely overweight man in a society that is obsessed with physical appearance. Tomlinson writes openly and honestly as he struggles with changing his life in an effort to lose a large amount of weight.

This book is not a "how to" and is written as more of a memoir. Tomlinson is self-aware and reflects on the choices and situations that helped get him into this situation, how the world around him reacted to him, and what he had to do to make big changes in his own life. This was a deeply personal story and I found it very approachable and relatable. Tomlinson has a great outlook on life that very much came across in his writing.

Thank you to NetGalley and Simon and Schuster for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.… (mehr)