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When It Rains: A Memoir

von Maggie MacKellar

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'My body, suddenly, carries two stories of loss ... One is easy for people to recognise. My mother died of cancer. I watched her age twenty-five years in eight weeks ... My other story marks me as different. It is more silent and more savage, it is not pure and no one knows how to approach it. Somewhere I lost my husband.' When Maggie's vibrant young husband, father to a five-year-old daughter and an unborn son, dies tragically, Maggie is left widowed and due to give birth three months later to their second child. Then her beloved mother, backbone of the family, mother to three children, grandmother to two, dies suddenly of aggressive cancer. In two short years, Maggie's life has shattered. After a year, she gives up trying to juggle single motherhood and the demands of an academic career and returns with her children to the family farm in central western New South Wales to take stock and catch a breath. The farm becomes a redemptive, healing place for Maggie and her children as they battle the heat and drought that only the Australian landscape can offer. She throws herself into the horses, sheep, ducks and chickens and slowly, finally, realises she has found a new shape for herself. Written by a brilliant new talent, WHEN IT RAINS is a meditation on grief and the vagaries of the human condition, and a stunning memoir about piecing back together a life, and moving forward, one step at a time.… (mehr)
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It feels somehow wrong to call a memoir of death, loss, grief, and mourning beautiful, but MacKellar's prose is lilting, poetic, and heart-wrenchingly haunting. Her descriptions of mourning her husband, whom she lost to suicide after a long bout of mental illness, and her descriptions of her mother, whom she lost to cancer, are touching and painful to read. The quest for a more quiet life for her and her two children lead her to the countryside, and the details of how this more quiet life allows her to mourn—with Anne Carson's translation of Sappho's fragments beside her—and also cope are as beautiful as they are straight from the gut. ( )
  proustitute | Apr 2, 2023 |
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'My body, suddenly, carries two stories of loss ... One is easy for people to recognise. My mother died of cancer. I watched her age twenty-five years in eight weeks ... My other story marks me as different. It is more silent and more savage, it is not pure and no one knows how to approach it. Somewhere I lost my husband.' When Maggie's vibrant young husband, father to a five-year-old daughter and an unborn son, dies tragically, Maggie is left widowed and due to give birth three months later to their second child. Then her beloved mother, backbone of the family, mother to three children, grandmother to two, dies suddenly of aggressive cancer. In two short years, Maggie's life has shattered. After a year, she gives up trying to juggle single motherhood and the demands of an academic career and returns with her children to the family farm in central western New South Wales to take stock and catch a breath. The farm becomes a redemptive, healing place for Maggie and her children as they battle the heat and drought that only the Australian landscape can offer. She throws herself into the horses, sheep, ducks and chickens and slowly, finally, realises she has found a new shape for herself. Written by a brilliant new talent, WHEN IT RAINS is a meditation on grief and the vagaries of the human condition, and a stunning memoir about piecing back together a life, and moving forward, one step at a time.

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