101/2021. Poison for Teacher, by Nancy Spain, is a 1949 camp comedy, murder mystery, girl's school novel with an lgb(t) bent, mostly l tbh. This is technically the fifth book in a loose series of nine but it works as a standalone. The protagonist is a retired "Russian" ballerina who has recently left her husband to move in with her female friend (which isn't explored as they immediately go adventuring - although we are shown that she leaves one person who dislikes her pekinese dog for another who behaves the same way but is a different sex). Her side-kick is a revue actress turned detective, based on real life star Hermione Gingold at her own request as, according to the author, she literally asked Spain to "Send me up as far as you like, but I do so want to be in a book...". They are employed as fake teachers at a girls' boarding school full of femmes who are potentially fatal but not at all fatale. Spain's writing style is the same as her performing style: a rapid succession of humour, clues, and red herrings. If you don't get one joke or clue then don't worry because several more will arrive almost immediately.

Camp comedy rarely ages well. It was originally people pushing at boundaries and trying to expand them through the medium of unthreatening humour, but now it's a reminder of those boundaries, so humour that was aimed to be progressive now seems retrogressive. Some people are still too culturally distant to understand even the most obvious outer layers of implications, or at least want to be seen that way: innocent of any understanding of homosexual contexts and subtexts (which are often also labelled as vulgarly sexualised). Some people get the more overt contextual jokes but not the subtextual layers, or again they do get them but don't want to be seen to be in the in-group who understand. For example, on pages 8-9 there are a series of lesbian in-jokes of varying complexity: a major character, Miss Lipscoomb, introduces herself as school mistress at Radcliff Hall School for Girls in Brunton-on-Sea by giving our heroines her card. This is a fairly obvious contextual joke about Radclyffe Hall the lesbian (and/or transgender) author. However, there is also a subtle implication, partly conveyed through the use of italics, that our theatrical heroines (who can be presumed to be aware of the contents of Soho phone boxes) think the "school mistress" is actually a (sapphic-themed) professional dominatrix. And as soon as they've established it's "a real school?" there's an unsubtle joke about the school mistress' partner Miss bbirch (sic) having just left her, which works whether read as "a real school" or otherwise. The Radclyffe Hall joke was, in 1949, sailing very close to the wind, while the dominatrix joke would have sailed so far over most readers' heads that I'm reluctant to admit I got it because it implies I see (lesbian) sexual implications where (to most readers) they don't exist. It's not only a deniable in-joke for the few, it's also one we're supposed to keep to ourselves and not share with outsiders. If you didn't grow up with boundary-pushing English camp comedy then a lot of the humour in Poison for Teacher will probably be opaque from your perspective, and even if you get the subtext it's subtle and aimed specifically at Nancy Spain's own socio-economic in-group in London in the late 1940s. There are plenty of other lines I assume are supposed to be meaningful but that go well over my head as I'm too young and an outsider to the social groups at which this novel is aimed. Of course it also helps if you've seen and heard both Nancy Spain's and Hermione Gingold's performances.

Anyway, this is either a novel that will make you laugh aloud at the in-jokes, or you'll think it's too "gay" for conservative comfort, or it's too closeted for contemporary progressives. Because porridge stirrers can only please Goldilocks about one third of the time. I personally especially enjoyed the fact that the stock policeman was quietly efficient, while our heroine detectives were often oblivious and messy: evidence versus intuition with evidence proving a clear winner, lol. I don't usually read murder mysteries so I can't judge how effective Poison for Teacher is except as a parody which it does well, especially sending up the supposed knee-jerk reactions of "average" 1940s murder mystery readers. I don't want to give anything away but I personally guessed whodunnit by, let's choose a round number, page 100 of 280, partly because of clues in the book but also because I understood enough of the in-jokes and subtext to predict where the story was heading. I would also think that most 21st century readers won't have that advantage but should guess whodunnit before it's confirmed in the text.

3.5*

Warnings for: basic descriptions of murder, unlikable protagonists with unpleasant opinions about almost everything (note that they are clearly intended as anti-heroines and Poison for Teacher is a parody of the murder mystery genre and don't assume the author shared any particular knee-jerk prejudices, especially not until you've finished the book and considered the implications), reactionary high camp depictions of homosexuals, racism (no slurs or stereotypes beyond the physically descriptive), anti-semitism (no slurs or stereotypes beyond the physically descriptive), jokes about Conservatives (with a large C) of the type that old school Conservatives told about themselves, and more in-jokes than many readers can tolerate. On the plus side, considerably less misogyny than the period, genre, and setting usually incorporates.

Quotes

My favourite running joke is the lady-doth-protest-too-much emphasis that Radcliff Hall School for Girls is not Roedean and is named after the famous red cliffs of Sussex and not anything, or anyone, else.

My favourite one-liner: "Gwen Soames screamed. Maud Stuckenheimer used a dreadful word that she must have picked up in the holidays"

Evergreen: "They were Conservatives, although Mrs. Micah (who was 35) was a Young Conservative."

The weather as red herring: "There was already a small clue to Spring in the air."

Admirable: "He outpointed St. Anthony on straight detective work."

A gay attitude: "The Chomondeley Club." / "Pronounced Beefeater."

Our heroines in the school dining hall before their first meal:
"Roger Partick-Thistle," said Miriam. "This is Mrs DuVivien."
"We are old friends," said Roger. "We met in Schizo-Frenia."
Natasha remembered him and his friend Morris only too well.
"I am to teach these limbs of Belial English verse and how to speak it," said Miriam.
"Do you know any?" said Roger, and giggled.
"I know Caviare comes from the Virgin Sturgeon," said Miriam severely. "What are you doing here?"
"Miss Lipscoomb is my aunt, actually," said Roger, bridling. "But as a matter of fact, dear, I don't spend my whole life in your dressing-room. I'm the visiting music-master. I teach the organ."
And Roger leered.
At this moment, with a terrible clattering of feet, chairs, tables, knives, cups, swords, and wands, the whole of East House crashed into the dining-room through one door and the whole of the staff of Radcliff Hall through the other. ( )

http://kaggsysbookishramblings.wordpress.com/2014/05/15/discovering-nancy-spain/ ( )

'Detective stories...combine all the worst faults of the crossword puzzle and the Grand Guignol and none of the compensations', 9 May 2014

Verified Purchase(What is this?)
This review is from: Poison for Teacher (Hardcover)
After a particularly nasty argument with her husband , a 'big, craggy all-in wrestler in his fifties', caused in part by Amy the Pekinese who had 'failed to be house-trained in the middle of Johnny's bed', the lovely Natasha goes to visit her friend Miriam. Owner of the 'Birdseye et Cie' detective agency, she has just been called to investigate dastardly goings-on at the wonderfully-named Radcliff Hall Girls' School....and Natasha accompanies her.
There's a lot of wonderful characters in what turns out to be a multiple-murder mystery. Could the culprit be womanizing Doctor Lariat? The (possibly) homicidal new girl? Former assistant-head, Miss bbirch? What about poor Charity Puke, classics mistress, who has a 'thing' for one of the other mistresses? Or even Roger Partick-Thistle, a stereotypical (but hilarious) homosexual and organ teacher (' "Rodgy would ride a lady's bicycle", said Miriam, "so louche of him" ').

Wonderful moments abound:
' "You are reading a thriller, I can see", said Natasha cosily. "Murder in the something....is it funny?"....."It is 'Murder in the Cathedral' by TS Eliot."
I loved the tired policeman finally getting to bed, where 'his toes instantly uncurled and crimped like an oyster in hot milk.'

Or a piece of land in Brunton-on-Sea, mentioned initially thus:
' "That piece of waste ground, said Mrs Grossbody, lowering her voice,"is known as Lover's Loose" '. "No?" said Miss Bound, "how AWFUL."
But later referred to: "On the edge of Lover's loose here, aren't you?" "Yes", said Lariat easily, "Nice and handy."

I'm not sure I followed all the twists of the plot, but don't think it really mattered - the humour's the thing! ( )

Humorous fiction of any kind is highly subjective and humorous crime fiction even more so.It is therefore with great delight that I can offer 'Poison for Teacher' up as a very funny book indeed.
Radcliffe Hall School for Girls is suffering badly with a number of members of staff being bumped off. Cue Miriam Birdseye and Natasha Nevkorina,a couple of (sort of) detectives who pose as teachers in an attempt to find the murderer. The crimes themselves are much less important than the goings on at the school. These include preparations for the school play and a maniacal game of Net-ball played as you have had it described before. Best of all is the cast of teachers and pupils,including Gylan Fork-Thomas the Chemistry Mistress,Miss Puke the Classics Mistress and Mrs Grossbody the Matron. Amongst the pupils is the terrible Julia Bracewood-Smith,a new girl.
Really funny - believe me. ( )