Jim Fay
Autor von Parenting With Love And Logic
Über den Autor
Bildnachweis: via loveandlogic.com
Werke von Jim Fay
Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood: Practical Parenting from Birth to Six Years (2000) 354 Exemplare
Helicopters, Drill Sergeants & Consultants: Parenting Styles and the Messages They Send (1994) 54 Exemplare
Meeting the Challenge: Using Love and Logic to Help Children Develop Attention and Behavior Skills (2000) 46 Exemplare
Grandparenting With Love & Logic: Practical Solutions to Today's Grandparenting Challenges (1994) 45 Exemplare
From Innocence to Entitlement: A Love and Logic Cure for the Tragedy of Entitlement (2005) 42 Exemplare
Schoolwide Discipline Plan Without the Loopholes: Yeah, but- A Salamander is Not a Fish! (2010) 20 Exemplare
Millionaire Babies or Bankrupt Brats: Love and Logic Solutions to Teaching Kids About Money (2008) 12 Exemplare
Four Steps to Responsibility: Techniques to Lead Children to Responsible Decision Making (1998) 11 Exemplare
Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers: Love and Logic Parenting for Early Childhood, 6 Months to 5 Years (1997) 10 Exemplare
Didn't I Tell You to Take Out the Trash: Techniques for Getting Kids to Do Chores Without Hassles (1996) 7 Exemplare
Quick and Easy Classroom Interventions: 23 Proven Tools for Increasing Student Cooperation (1998) 7 Exemplare
Love Me Enough to Set Limits: Building Your Child's Self-Esteem With Thoughtful Limit Setting (1996) 5 Exemplare
Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers: Love and Logic Parenting for Early Childhood (2 Audio Cassettes) (1997) 2 Exemplare
Yeah, but...a salamander is not a fish! Schoolwide Discipline Plan Without the Loopholes 2 Exemplare
Four Steps to Responsibility CD 1 Exemplar
Who says you're so great?: Building a three legged table, your child's self concept (1983) 1 Exemplar
Becoming a Love & Logic Parent (Modules 1-7) 1 Exemplar
Helping Kids Face Today's World 1 Exemplar
Love me Enough to set some Limits CD 1 Exemplar
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1. Parenting should not be a power struggle. My job as a parent is not to control my child. (This is not in the book, but I really like partnering/collaborating with my 5yo to find solutions to conflicts. As the book says, kids should have opportunities to exercise power over their lives.)
2. Keep in mind your ultimate goal as a parent. For most of us, it's for our kids to become independent and trustworthy. This can't happen if we never trust them. We have to give them opportunities to make choices and suffer consequences within reason.
3. Be consistent with boundaries. This is especially important for very young children who don't understand how context guides behavior. For example, if you let your child make a big mess and laugh about it one day (because, say, it's a lazy Sunday) but then the next day you get super upset when they make a big mess (because, say, it's Monday morning and you have to get to work) it's confusing for little kids. Consistency (to the point of even saying "uh-oh" in the same sing-song way every time you want to discourage a behavior) will really help guide behavior.
A few things the book advocates that don't work for me:
1. Don't lecture. --okay, this sounds good. But the authors recommend parents keep mum and let experience be their child's teacher. This doesn't always work for me because I'm a verbal person raising a verbal kid. Some things are better learned first by talking together. For example, if we're having a conflict over toothbrushing, I'm not going to quietly let my kids get cavities so they can learn from experience why toothbrushing matters. I'm going to describe in detail how much it sucks to get a cavity and explain that a trip to the dentist is expensive. (This has worked pretty well for us, btw.)
2. Never lose your cool. --again this sounds good. But it basically encourages parents to trick kids into thinking the kids have no power to upset their parents. I think this will inevitably come across as hollow as your kids get older. I'd rather be authentic with my kid about my feelings. Honestly, I don't think I could pull off unflappable anyway.
3. Lock your kid in their room when they misbehave because you can't control their behavior but you can control their location. --yeah, this is bad advice. Please don't routinely lock your child in their room, even if you're standing just outside the door. Google "love withdrawal" as a parenting/discipline technique and you'll find research that shows this doesn't work well.… (mehr)