Christopher Pelloski, M.D., tackles one of the most distasteful social behaviors in the human repertoire head on in "Trauma, Shame, and the Power of Love". Within this rather unprecedented and one of a kind text, Pelloski describes his own experiences in watching multiple instances of child pornography and then describes the moral and legal actions and issues which he deals with upon his discovery. Predictably, one comes away with mixed feelings about Pelloski’s character and his motivations both as an involved party and as an author. One also confronts the impact of society’s dealing with the issue. No matter one’s feelings or conclusions, it is a worthwhile read for the importance of the subject and its viewpoint.

Like many other narratives written from the experiential end of the mental illness spectrum, Pelloski calls out for more behavioral treatment in healthcare from qualified psychologists and psychiatrists. While not excusing himself, he does relate an early childhood history of sexual abuse and subsequently describes his initial offenses as rooted in the PTSD – post traumatic stress disorder - of his own childhood. The book focuses only upon his end of the issue; other childrens’ side of such experiences is another person’s narrative to write.

There are legal tiers in child porn that he describes including exclusively observers (non-producers), porn producers, and inspired molesters. Pelloski falls exclusively with the 1st group. The general theme of the book focuses on the rigid adherence to Federal sentencing guidelines at the expense of judges’ discretion with regards to this group. He makes a point of discussing how numerous professionals believe that the populist approach to legal and psychological rehabilitation has simply gotten out of hand.

Pelloski engages in two discussions of a cost-benefit approach to dealing with illicit porn – one which merits serious contemplation, another which has a serious underlying danger. Citing a number of legal scholars and judges, he points out that the large amount of money spent on catching and prosecuting observer – only offenders would be better spent on the more important task of catching those who produce it and/or others who engage in hands-on abuse. For America’s party of cutting-taxes-is-all-that-matters and also other political groups, this is a vital consideration. Nevertheless, politician and others see value in targeting non-producers:

"The authors of the material I read speculate that what keeps [non-producer prosecution] going, like most poor public policy, is fear, ignorance, and misinformation. The news media, elected politicians, law enforcement, and federal prosecution offices have also realized what an easy target nonproduction child pornography cases present. It is not surprising that these comprise the overwhelming majority of new sex offenses cases (despite being the least threatening subtype with the lowest recidivism rate). The political and PR return on investment is lucrative, indeed. It takes very little effort to catch someone accessing child pornography online, the public brings its approval to the voting booth, and the headlines write themselves."

He then asks a very provocative question regarding the threat of this class of offenders to the public:

"Why was I observed online for nine months? If law enforcement had a legitimate fear that I was a danger to children (my own or pediatric patients), why was nothing done for all that time? I can only conclude it was already known that I was not an immediate hands-on threat. It was more important to spend many months building the case, so I was allowed. . . The police’s inaction tacitly disclosed their position on the matter: that the harm I was generating toward children was not worth preventing sooner"

This kind of cost/benefit/risk analysis is good to contemplate. However, he also mentions the fact that, within his own case, his usefulness as a doctor is wasted. That point has a dangerous flip side which is the unfairness factor. A younger person – say twenty-five years of age – has much less to offer. Worse yet, they might be in an economically or racially disadvantaged group. Bringing societal utility into the discussion poses a steep and slippery slope.

From time to time his tone gets sufficiently self-exculpatory to get under a person’s skin. However, his viewpoint is educational. His training in science and medicine also are put to good use in the research required for introducing facts and arguments with minimal filtration through holier-than-thou emotions (and he also calls out America’s overly populous fake Christian community for sensationalizing the legal process). A very useful read, however one’s view of the author evolves. ( )

Although sexual abuse and pornography of children is nothing new within this society, each time it is discovered and reported there is an accompanying knee jerk reaction of anger, disgust and distrust that follows so much so that it becomes hard to see the many facets of the whole truth about the situation such was the case with Christopher E. Pelloski M.D. In his book, Trauma, Shame and the Power of Love, which is a biographical work, he bares his soul and shares his experiences from arrest to trial as a non-productive participant of child pornography.
From the outset reading, Dr. Pelloski’s stark memoir, created an intense paradox of emotions within me, especially because I am a parent of six children. On the one hand, he was a Pediatric Oncologist whose job and intention was to help children at their most vulnerable moment and he made great strides in doing so. But on the other hand, he also participated in the very vulgar and harmful activity of online viewing of sexual abuse involving children, a sickening activity brought on by his own efforts to come to terms with his own sexual abuse as a child.
Initially, I was infuriated how could a doctor who is also a father, be so crude, so vicious, so sick when it comes to our young? He was supposed to help them not find them sexually alluring. However, once I became more deeply embroiled in the book I began to see more clearly the other side of that scenario that the perpetrators of child pornography, whether producers, actors or vicarious viewers could also be victims of childhood sexual abuse and are sorely in need stringent monitoring and psychological help. Don’t get me wrong, while my heart goes out to author Pelloski, in regards to his appalling experiences as a victim of sexual abuse as a child, I am tremendously glad that he got caught and is getting the help that he needs.
Overall, the quality of the book was well done; author Pelloski’s narrative was well written, and thoughtfully organized. His inclusion of related sex offense laws, the presiding judge’s sentencing statement, medical and psychiatric statements related his particular disorders made this book a cogently expansive read especially when it comes to understanding the punishment of the perpetrators. While reading this book was not a pleasure it was a genuinely illuminating reading experience that I found deeply affecting and stayed with me well after completing the book. However, I did find that at times within his narrative there was a narcissistic bent that I did find somewhat off-putting considering the nature of the book, but ultimately understood as that seems to go along with the mental disorders that he suffers from. It is a shame that Dr. Pelloski’s great work in the oncology field, including the many patients he helped are now largely discounted by his criminal actions and ensuing punishment. Unfortunately, the war against cancer is real and he was a warrior in his field albeit, a broken one.
Summarily, Dr. Pelloski’s work within this book has forever changed my personal viewpoints about child pornography/child sex abuse the applicable the laws, the punishment, the victims, the perpetrators and their varying levels of participation. This is a tumultuous read, but I do recommend it to adult readers with the intestinal fortitude to handle the strong subject matter. ( )