I still have a block about online networking, which is what this book is sorta about, although some of it applies to the other kind of networking, which I am starting to try to do. I guess the main thing I learned is the I think she called it ‘light touch’—like you can pretend to be a Little normal and superficial even if you’re not; you don’t have to only talk to people when you need a kidney or a publisher for your book ‘Plato and the Meaning of Life’, right. (Or if you want to fight or f—be extroverted, right. 🐣). That way, people don’t think that you only talk to them to waste their time or demand a limb. (Or…. Something, right. 😸).

…. On the one hand, it’s intentionally specialized, so to speak, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to network well without doing a lot of it in person, especially since historically the internet has been where I’ve gone to be free and express myself and escape basically. It’s almost easier to socialize in person. But to be kinda anti anti, which is kinda a tic with me sometimes, a lot of people are (theoretically) anti-technology and anti-internet (often telling the World Wide Web so, lol), and think that 1955 (or possibly 1913) was the high water mark of the West or whatever the fuck it is, right: because those midcentury giants think there’s exactly one way to think, formal written intellectual, and everything should be written down and some things shouldn’t exist to be written down, (that way it doesn’t matter that there are more servants than masters at the Great House, the servants are just so many hands, not even something you market to, just something you try to forget, and condition out of existence), and the internet is both verbal and written and in general kinda mixed or in-between, absorbing many features of the spoken language in its written form, so….

I mean, so people freak out, but they should get over themselves. Good night, (Mid-ville, USA), I love you! Thanks so much, Comedy Central! (walks away)

…. Although I knew some of the things mentioned in this book, since I’ve started to make an effort to un-de-materialize, several of them were deepened by this book and overall it’s a surprisingly good little book, even if I feel like if I tried to take the learnings out of context and immediately re-package them, they’d probably come across as facile or superficial or whatever (since we all know better than businesspeople, for some damn reason or another, right).

But maybe I’ll even start to enjoy, slightly, interacting in a consciously normative presentable-in-public way on LinkedIn, you know, and in similar real-life situations, you know.

Though I suppose it will always be a sort of second language, you know, learned and employed carefully—momentarily lost in moments of abandon. (smiles) Or at least, no longer available in those moments.

…. Sometimes networking events kinda have the feel of non-events, but even then, it is nice to be open to the world of activity & relationship.

It’s a good book.

…. And I do agree incidentally that ageism is a deficiency like the other forms of background filtering, you know. It’s better for everyone if maybe it takes us longer to get to the top, but we’re more secure at the end of our life’s journey, than it is to blow up and fizzle out.

Although the main point is of course that you should “keep in loose touch” with people when you don’t need to immediately ask for their first child, you know—not only talking to people when you need the big favor—and “weak ties”: somebody doesn’t have to be your bosom buddy/a-friend-who’s-closer-than-a-therapist to talk with someone briefly occasionally so that you both know the other exists, and is there to give or receive help if necessary or advantageous.

…. And, in the end, although they call the surface of life “workaday” for a reason, I also think that you can play a more effective “big game” if you’re not running flat out out an aversion to the ordinary, you know.

Probably more useful for people with a lot of control over their daily schedule (consultants, freelancers, etc.) rather than people who work a strict 9-to-5. The whole second sections was devoted to how introverts should just network online using social media instead of in person. While I agree this might be better in terms of energy management in some ways, it is worse in others if you can't post to Twitter/Facebook/LinkedIn/etc. during your workday so you wind up having to do another hour or more of screen time every day just to keep your network up and going. If I was someone who already spent a lot of time on social media sites, this would make sense but I have made a conscious effort to limit my time on those sites to avoid getting sucked down the doomscrolling rabbit hole. Ultimately, I think any book promising to make networking easier for introverts is probably overselling its advice. ( )

People assume that we introverts are lousy networkers; but some of our skills/qualities actually benefit the networking process. This book brings that to light in an encouraging way.

I especially appreciated the specific language suggestions when approaching various connection goals.

I won't likely use all of the specific social media platform advice offered.

Soon after I started the borrowed audiobook, I ordered a hardcover copy to keep. ( )