Fleur BealeRezensionen

Kirby has always taken care of her mother more than her mother has taken care of her: she does all the bill paying and grocery shopping, and keeps her mom on a budget as best she can. But just before Christmas her mom starts acting strange and nervous, and then suddenly they're packing their belongings and leaving town, with no real explanation. Her mother leaves Kirby with the family she's never met and who belong to a strict Christian cult the lives by The Rule. She's renamed Esther, forced to live by the cult's oppressive ways, and finds herself slowly losing her identity even as she fights to maintain it. Will she be able to escape and find her mother? Will she ever be Kirby again?

A good story that keeps the tension without getting too dark, and gives a good look into how harmful such sects can be both physically and mentally. Nicely drawn characters and good pacing.½

do you ever feel like the only person on goodreads who Didn't Get It

this was so short and left me somewhere in the realm of "eh, okay," so i'm not even gonna pretend to format this like a proper review. enjoy jotnotes...

the good

- kirby herself. a goddamn fireball who i found pretty funny, wild, reckless, and for all her big talk, still had a heart and kindness to give to her 'siblings' and some of the church kids who she was initially a snot about

- loved loved loved how kirby became a big sister to Maggie, and how important Maggie was. I felt like she was dropped in the ending and we all forgot about her, but for someone who expected ONLY kirby and daniel to be the pair of rebellious awesome break-away teens while everyone else were god-fearing pests, i liked how close kirby got to the kids and how caring she became - in her own wild way.

- i appreciate kirby's conflicted feelings towards her mom. i feel like the proper emotional beats got scrambled and a little lost in the delivery, but all the pieces were there and they GENERALLY locked together nicely, so...yeah

- writing style. bugged me at first because it took me by surprise, but once i realized i was essentially reading a novella (my ereader calculated the pages as being hardly over 100 so it at least FELT shorter) i appreciated it more. while the story isn't packed with events, the style races us through at warp-speed. kirby's colourful commentary and humour were also really nice


the bad

- the Big One: the theme/thread that was apparently supposed to be so important that it became the title. man, this...was a let-down. kirby didn't change AT ALL. while the relationship with her mother swung a bit wildly, every other arc between her and the characters were predictable and tepid at best, and her relationship with the "persona" of Esther was wooorrrse. Kirby from start to finish was loud about her hatred of the rules, unwilling to budge, self-righteous, and cranky. It tried to sneak in some lines that held NO weight and NO evidence in her actual actions about how she was feeling herself drifting to their side or something, but they were so out of place and so ridiculously obvious that they felt like they were cut-pasted in after the novel was done as a second thought. they had no consequences beyond some throwaway lines about "o no i am esther" "no you aren't" "oh okay it's cool now." was i supposed to think that her saving Naomi FROM DEATH was a big sign of how she was changing and warming up to them? idk man I would call the police for some rando on the street, this doesn't prove anything.

- the "villains" were caricatures. like, i get the point, but kirby's biased narration left me feeling like i was missing something. i mean, they weren't completely irredeemable/void of any human qualities besides "pray", right?

- repetitive with things that were supposed to make me uncomfortable. they did initially - damn this uncle locking her away and praying like a maniac! but kirby was so bullheaded and dismissive that i stopped caring, and yet it still kept hammering the same punishments for the same boring bad behaviour. her cutting off her hair was really satisfying for a reason, and broke the monotony that kirby was apathetic about so i was too. that scene alone should put this point on a "ehhh okay" list but we have none.

- idk that about summarizes it

I was truly happy for her - for both of them.
I'd never felt so alone.

My review to I Am Not Esther wasn't exactly glowing. Hell, the entire time I read it, I wasn't exactly having the time of my life either - but there was something in it that kept me interested and reading, and to I Am Rebecca's credit, I think it tapped into whatever that was with more strength and more confidence. I enjoyed this one a ton more, although I've got my gripes on some pretty obvious things.

The subtlety of the writing style suited the banality, the routine, the lack of autonomy that Rebecca experiences in her faith, and despite that, I found myself really liking Rebecca. I thoroughly enjoyed following her around on this montage of curious events and quiet take on oddities and the small special things in her life. Things like the patterned petticoats and the worldly market really stuck out as precious, no matter how simple they were, without parading it in the narrative.

And this is gonna be the most obvious thing to say, but in stark contrast to Esther, I just really enjoyed the...events? I don't know? I found it interesting and fast-paced (although the synopsis calling it a thriller is such a ridiculous joke, call it a bloodbath horror why don't you), with a gentle touch of drama and emotion.

But on the flipside, that gentleness, that banality, was also to blame for its biggest failings for me. It felt one-note and emotioness even though it had plenty of tense, frightening moments; it all read the same, and it seemed to greatly struggle at breaking past its surface of tedium to actually get into some real emotions. Don't get me wrong, I cared for Rebecca's fate, and was appropriately scared, disgusted, and angry for her, but it all felt so passive and shallow.

Next up is the religion deal. This book is about religion, but it's not a religious book - and ok, if it decides that it's not its goal to preach to me, then fine. But you can't write a character in a deeply religious community, where religion is all she knows, and be afraid to talk about God. God was ever-present for sure, but in a way where it felt like they were talking about a piece of furniture instead of a being of some sort that mattered SO MUCH to everyone. All thoughts about God were at arm's length, as if Beale was afraid of making her character wonder something about God in case someone would get mad at her (like, I read a lot of 'I prayed to the Lord' but none of 'I hope the Lord listened', 'Why would the Lord speak to Stephen if Stephen is such a major douche', 'what does the Lord think?'). Whether Beale wanted it or not, Rebecca's faith begged for God to be a character, even a distant abstract one. To Esther, God was some weird imaginary thing. To Rebecca, God is a very important person in her life, and I bought absolutely none of it when we couldn't break the surface of her faith into any real feeling or any real connection or perceived connection.

Near the end, it touched briefly on some real solid lines about her doubt ("the Lord got mixed up with Elder Stephen. I didn't have a scrap of belief in Elder Stephen"), and it found the foothold it had been scrambling for the whole rest of the book - but having Rebecca doubt these enormous claims ("or hell in eternity when I died. Unless that wasn't true either") felt flimsy when all I had about her faith before was "well I guess she believes because she lives there." It's just frustrating to have the book try and make me feel and doubt and tip off the edge into a new character arc when there was nothing before it. This is my big hang-up with I Am Not Esther all over again. Ughhhhhh.

Whatever. Despite that, forget about God, forget about religion - forget about all of that and I really liked it. The characters were really lovely, the simple ideas and simple situations were pleasant and their drama & stakes were weighed with a careful hand. I really loved Rebecca herself, and I'm even in a space where I wanted a more conclusive ending not because I'm being a gremlin about the technical aspect, but because I wanted to know she was okay. Just again, it only scratched the surface with its emotion and its themes.

I Am Not Esther by New Zealand author Fleur Beale is an engrossing story about a modern girl, Kirby, whose mother leaves her in the care of her strict and pious brother, Caleb, who along with his wife and children are members of a Religious Sect called Children of the Faith. This faith is rigidly traditional. Kirby is immediately renamed Esther and forced to wear her hair tied back in a braid. Her clothes are replaced by long skirts, she is forbidden to use slang or take lord’s name in vain. Failure to follow the rules means immediate punishment, which included long hours on her knees and the whole family praying over her. Women were considered to be the property of the men and early marriages were arranged.

Although terribly confused and angry at her mother for leaving her with these people, she does grow very fond of her cousins, and eventually helps the eldest boy, Daniel, make a break with the community. Although her mother was to have gone to Africa to work as a nurse, it is discovered that she never left New Zealand. Kirby needs to find her mother and discover her reasons for leaving and for abandoning her daughter in this way. Kirby also realizes that she needs to get away as she is in danger of losing her own identity.

Well written and mostly believable, I Am Not Esther was an enjoyable YA read. The story flowed easily and although the Children of the Faith are fictional, the ideas and life style they supported seemed real and gave the reader a good idea of how restrictive a cult like this can be.

Riley's mother goes away, leaving her with an uncle and his family - family that she has never heard of before. Suddenly she is a member of a strict religious cult living by 'the rule'. She has her name changed and a severe set of social rules imposed on her. There is no TV, radio, newspapers or mirrors and she now has to wear the cult's unusual clothing. A really good insight into the fanatical and downright scary world of cults.

Three boys adopt an old car after paying $100 each to the council. They do it up as a paddock basher as they haven't got their licences yet.
Story about growing up and getting a part time job so you can have money and not rely on handouts from your divorced father.
Boy takes a job at a dairy farm - responsibility when owner has a heart attack.
Relationship with nagging grandfather and eventually gets his licence.
Also meets some girls on the beach.

Set in Christchurch just before the shallow earthquake of 2011 that destroyed the city and killed nearly 200 people because it occurred at lunchtime. Lyla and her mates have a day off school and are shopping in the city when the quake strikes. Her mother and father are also in the city when it happens and her first concerns are for their welfare. As she starts to walk home Lyla sees her Doctor mother helping with a rescue and then Lyla herself becomes caught up in the rescue of a man bleeding profusely from a head wound.
This book is all about the days afterwards - how Lyla's house becomes a sort of refuge for the neighbors who can't stay in their unstable houses. She rescues a nasty bully from up the street and he turns out to be quite nice. Her brother works in the student volunteer army delivering food to people and all the while she is worried about her doctor father who she hasn't heard from in 2 days!
Very gripping book by Beale who has experienced earthquakes in New Zealand herself and the school that Lyla attends in the book is real and a lot like St Margarets. There were a few words that are kiwi slang that I had to look up and I found the preparedness of the New Zealand people - earthquake drills for preppies, every house has a landline and a supply of emergency water, etc.

Blurb: "Charismatic, driven and self-righteous Neville Cooper set up his own brand of Christian utopia on earth: a reclusive community on the West Coast of New Zealand. For the 400 inhabitants [also known as Cooperites] of Gloriavale, his word is law - despite his 1995 conviction for sexual abuse. Phil Cooper, as headstrong as his father, had to escape. But Phil's wife Sandy was bound to the will of Neville and his brand of eternal salvation. And so began the monumental tug-of-war between father and son: a son who wanted to give his children a chance in the world".

Fleur Beale has undertaken an extraordinary journey working with Phil Cooper and his son Israel to tell the story of this New Zealand cult and give others an insight into how they work. Extremely disturbing, this is a book that should be widely read.½

A New Song in the Land (alternate title: 'Mission Girl') is about a 14-year-old Maori girl called Atapo, a chief's daughter. Many of her whanau are killed during a battle, and she is captured and kept as a slave by a rival iwi. When sickness threatens the iwi, her grandmother has a vision and tells her to run. She escapes under cover of darkness and makes her way to the the Waimate mission station in the Bay of Islands run by William Williams. Here she starts to learn new ways, but when a man comes asking about her she must move again, this time to the Paihia Mission Station run by Henry Williams. She learns to read and write in the English language and also to write in Maori. Events unfold around the signing of the Treaty of Waitangi in 1840 and Atapo is baptised. However her grandmother, Marama, haunts her dreams and she must try to return to her people and share her new knowledge.

A really well written historical fiction book that can deepen understanding of this time in the history of Aotearoa.

Again, I am fascinated by cults, and this Australian novel was a well-crafted examination of a very unique group. It's a shame that books like this are so hard to come by in the states.

The third and final in the I am not Esther series. Four years have passed since Rebecca ran away from her family and the closed religious community, The Children of the Faith. Increasingly unstable leader, Elder Stephen, who Rebecca was to marry, never misses an opportunity to take his revenge out on Rebecca's family. Rebecca's younger sister, Magdalene, is now twelve years old and looking out for her strong-minded little sister, Zillah, as well as coping with an increasingly stressful situation. Their father seems to only be able to pray whilst their mother's mental health has taken a turn for the worse as she constantly finds fault, preaches at them and takes to her bed. The tension within the community is growing as some are discontented and want to split. How can Magdalene protect her little sister, and can they find their older siblings if they do make it out into the world? Another wonderful book from Fleur Beale and a fitting end to this though-provoking series that I highly recommend for teens.

Sequel to 'I Am Not Esther' which was published in 1998. When Rebecca and her twin sister turn 14, they will find out who they are to marry. All the girls in their strict religious sect, The Children of the Faith, must be married just after their 16th birthdays. Whilst the girls are initially happy with the choices made for them, Rebecca's intended is forced out of the sect because of decisions made by the seventy-seven year old leader whose wife has recently died. It is only later that Rebecca finds out why - when the leader chooses her to be his new wife! Rebecca's older brother, sister, and cousin have all previously escaped from the Children of the Faith and as the wedding date draws closer, Rebecca is caught between her family and her future. A fitting sequel to Beale's first book in this series, well written and engaging.½

I always enjoy reading Fleur Beale’s works as they are relative to New Zealand. This title was an excellent follow on from I am not Esther as it links Esther’s new life to those of her relatives still living within the commune. Life inside a religious cult becomes too much for 16-year-old Rebecca when she finds out who she is to marry. When she turns 14, Rebecca will find out who she is to marry. All the girls in her strict religious sect must be married just after their 16th birthday. Her twin sister Rachel is delighted when Saul, the boy she loves, asks to marry her. Malachi asks for Rebecca. She believes him to be a good and godly man. But will Rebecca find there is a dark side to the rules which have kept her safe? What does the future hold? Can the way ahead be so simple when the community is driven by secrets and hidden desires?

read it in one sitting - quite easy to read as well as involving. Described as a best selling New Zealand classic - young adult.

Is she Esther? Her new family tells her she is. Or is she Kirby? That’s the name and the identity she has grown up with. Who is she, really?

Kirby’s mother disappears and Kirby is sent to live with her uncle and his family. The family is part of a dogmatic fundamentalist religious group. Men make all decisions. There are no tvs, no movies, and no books. Women must marry at sixteen and must dress in clothing that conceals. Rules, rules, rules. But there are also the consolations of strong, supportive family ties and of prayer.

Kirby is confused. She desperately wants to leave; at the same time, she desperately loves this new family. And where is her mother?

A well-written, thoughtful book with a serious look at the difficulties and strengths of following the dictates of a group.

disappointing, this story did not grab me until the last few chapters as it was in these chapters that the title matched the story line. Prior to this it was all about an over protective depressed mother and her son who was trying to get even with the bullies next door. The characters in the story portrayed a blended NZ family and as I read I kept thinking, ' Is this what NZ family life has become? or ‘For goodness sake is there no safe place in NZ’ or ‘Are you going to get punched and kicked in your street, mall or beach? “This weak story is about a submissive father and confident daughter from his first marriage living with an over protective, manic depressed partner and her molly coddled son, Anthony. Anthony wants to earn money and due to his naivety he believes he can catch a paua poaching ring and hold them to ransom.

I could not help but feel let down by this book. I have read a number of fleur Beale books, and I really enjoy the way she writes about real world girls in real world situations. For the most part I enjoyed reading about Bess's determination and her struggles to help her father and especially about the negative relationship between her and her mother. What disappointed me the most in this book, was the whole "past life" thing. It may be the purpose of the book, but it was a pretty lame plotting device! The fact that in a past life she had been male and married to her now-step mother's previous self, and been responsible for her death seemed pretty wacko, but it was made even worse when she "recognised" the boy in the Olive Grove. Now... I despise with a passion any teenage book that essentially has a "true love at first sight and it is reciprocated" part to it. Relationships don't start with so much spontaneity and passion - at least not those that last. About two thirds of the way through, Bess switched from this smart, go-ahead, kick-arse teenage and turned into a lovesick puppy. And when it was reciprocated, well... I almost tossed the book then and there! After that the actual interesting part of the plot seemed to dwindle down to nothing and we were treated to a very rushed ending that essentially left me feeling unsatisfied and annoyed.

In conclusion - if this book had just been about how Bess, after being almost-expelled from her boarding school due to a drunken bout (brought on by who-cares-what but the hallucination did not even seem a convincing inducement) and forced to live in a small town with her control-freak, self-obsessed mother whilst assisting her father to save his business and maybe striking up a friendship (and eventual romantic relationship) with a boy she knew from her youth (who had teased her and bullied her mercilessly, but now "grown up") and had her mother hijack the relationship - it would have been an excellent teenage drama, filled with personality clashes and bittersweet angst, worhty of four or five stars. But no, Beale had to ruin it by trying to toss in a half-pie supernatural edge that turned it into instead a saccharine mess. It's only getting three stars because I loved the way Bess interacted with the factory workers and because of her spiteful mother.

This book deals with a lot of family issues e.g breakdown of nucleus family, step father, step brothers, favouritism, small house large blended family. All these issues are fraught with the frustration of individuals feeling undervalued and not part of the family, 'End of the Alphabet' looks at this in a diluted way. Ruby Yarrow is a 14 year old who lives in a busy, loving, chaotic family with her mum, stepdad, brother and two little stepbrothers. Ruby's surname Yarrow is at the end of the alphabet and when the roll gets called out she's always at the end and she hates it. Ruby feels a bit like a doormat - she has to help out in the family a lot while her brother Max doesn't. He wins lots of prizes at school and she has a learning difficulty and needs a reader/writer to help her in exams. She has great friends and loves clothes, fashion magazines and sewing and she's got a real knack for it. She's very keen to go on the school trip to Brazil and so gets a job to earn the money to go - works in a supermarket for an old grump, learns a bit of Portuguese, meets exchange students, doesn't get to go on the trip but stands up to her parents (gets some backbone) and starts to see herself in a much better light. There's even a bit of romance thrown in. It's about having a dream and aiming for it. But it's not sentimental, it's a great read, very real and it has a lovely upbeat tone.

Opening Sentence: ‘…On Taris, we shave our heads …’

Juno is a young girl who is living in an isolated island society of 500 people that fled the chaos of the 21st century. A group of pioneer scientists volunteered to start the new civilisation on an island “somewhere in the southern ocean,” there they developed an enclosed dome where the atmosphere; water; rain and temperatures are all regulated by computers and it is designed to survive even if the rest of humanity perished. Not long after the colony is set up they lose contact with “the Outside”.

JUNO OF TARIS commences when Juno is 12, and she has already started to openly question the rules of Taris. Questions such as why must they all shave their heads every week? Why must they all wear the same clothes and why are her grandparents teaching her to read and not allow her to tell anyone – even her parents? To publicly question the established way brings about the punishment of withdrawing, where everyone has to turn their back on you as you walk by – a very isolating and distressing experience!!! Gradually Juno learns that she is not alone in wanting questions answered, and as it becomes obvious that someone is willing to kill Juno to stop her perceived rebellion she finds she has a loyal band of friends who stand with her and seek the hidden truths as the dome’s technology starts to fail.

The plot the story is built on is powerful and looks at societies, those who control societies, and how they are able to do so. Author Fleur Beale wrote this book with tremendous detail, yet the scientific component was written simply. As a whole JUNO OF TARIS was a pleasure to read and a great story.

All of the characters, both good and bad, were very realistic. The plot was easy to follow and I really liked how each of the chapters ended with three or four snippets from conversations regarding island gossip. It helped expand on information already gained, and set up what was going to happen next; giving the reader an insight into the networking and information sharing of the community.

JUNO OF TARIS won the Esther Glen Award in New Zealand in 2009 – the award is presented to the author whose work is considered a distinguished contribution to fiction for children. Well deserved in my opinion.

The previous novel, Juno of Taris, ended with the arrival of outsiders and the small community realising that domed island of Taris was in big trouble due to cracks appearing in the protective cover that makes their island airtight, and the support systems failing one by one. Initially leaving was going to be an option with the inhabitants able to choose to either leave the island or stay, now the leaving option has escalated to leave now or die. A huge storm is scheduled to hit the island in a few hours and their rescuers think the whole dome will break. This proves true, and as they travel through the fierce September storm on a ship the 500 Taris inhabitants watch the dome disintegrate and carry away all the buildings on the island.

On arrival in Wellington the people of Taris discover that the world is very different from when their elders were first sealed away. The world’s population has been reduced to around a million by a series of pandemics that have ravaged the world; global warming has left whole cities empty. A bomb attack welcomes the Tarians, and when they are housed in a refugee centre they realise they need to quickly familiarise themselves with the new society they are to be a part of, the money, food, technologies, clothes and work.

Willem is the person who rescued the Tarians and soon it is apparent that there is a subversive element within New Zealand that is conducting a hate campaign via the internet, against Willem and as a flow on, the Tarians. Shortly after their arrival a new pandemic breaks out and the Tarians are accused of bringing it to New Zealand. Who hates the Tarians so much that they want to destroy them?

In Juno of Taris, each chapter is ended with a few sentences of different gossipy information recording the Tarians passing information on to each other. FIERCE SEPTEMBER does the same but with an added bonus at the end of each chapter there is the web address of a blog posting which actually exists. If they have access to the internet, readers can access and read the two opposing blog postings. One is someone from the boat who is for the group and the other blog is one of the subversive agitators who are whipping up anti-refugee hysteria, along with comments to both blogs. Such a clever idea – but nothing is revealed that is not in the book, so people without internet access won’t miss out on crucial information.

It doesn’t take Juno and her friends long to realise that things will not be the same outside and if they can stop the pandemic and clear their names then they will leave their temporary refuge and be absorbed into the New Zealand community as individual and small family groups.

I really enjoyed this second book in the trilogy, was well written and narrated from the point of view of Juno. I cannot wait for the final book to come out, but that is not looking like it will happen before 2012

Juno and the Taris inhabitants must leave their dying island. The young people look forward to a wider life Outside, but Outside too has its problems. It is two-year-old Hera, with her uncanny ability to foresee events, who saves the Taris people from the injury and death prepared for them by an underground group of protestors.
The people of Taris, though, have no choice but to try to live in this seemingly hostile place. The young people are entranced despite the hate campaign against them: there are the fashions, the technologies and best of all for Juno, the freedom from extreme control. Only days after the group arrives, a pandemic hits the country - this has drastic consequences for Juno and her people.
Once the pandemic is over, life settles down and the question now for Juno is to find her way among the choices open to her, some of which cause her parents to fear she is abandoning the values they hold so dear.
Juno was relieved to put Taris behind her. But Taris doesn't give up its hold so easily - she is shocked to find the island held more secrets than any of them knew. She wants to bury her head, ignore what she's discovered and forge ahead to find her own place in this new world. She falls for Ivan, a young man who seems to understand her, but love is a fey thing. What will become of her? i now know that the 3rd book Heart of Danger is here, yes it will be read

This entire series is a wonderful way to learn history or teach it to adolescents. I find today's generations seem to recall more when they learn through other people (pop songs, celebrity gossip, etc.), so what better way to teach history than through someone else's perspective? Yes, "authentic" diaries would be "better", but would the language really hold the modern student's attention? Did the diary writer know what WOULD be important in the context of history? Probably not.

This is a compelling story of a girl, Kirby, who is suddenly left with her very religious relatives while her mother goes to Africa to be an aid worker. She is given a new name, new, modest clothes and a set of new, very restrictive rules to obey. Terrified, she tries to contact her mother without success. Although she forms bonds with some of the other children she begins to find her identity drifting away from her.½

I got this book out because I like Fleur Beale, and because I'm interested in the Cooperites (I mean, a cult? In New Zealand? Wowsers). As far as I know, this is the only book written about them. This isn't really a book about the Gloriavale Community, however, but a family who left. I personally didn't find them that interesting - the book's hero, Phil Cooper really irritated me. I mean, he took his 37 children (or so it felt like) out of the supportive Hutterite community in which they settled, to live in relative poverty in Australia... because he had to "prove that he could make it on his own", ie because he had daddy issues. Ugh, spare me. AND WHY DID HE HAVE TO SHOOT THE DOG? Anyway. The stuff that actually dealt with the community was interesting, and this might be worth a look if you're interested in how cults affect families, but I got bored with the Coopers pretty quickly.

brilliant well worth reading, the reviews express the book well.